Throughout these last 5 years as I've walked through my strawbale house (in my head, of course) I can see the warmth of the sunshine as it comes through the carefully placed windows. I can smell the earthiness of the bales and the plaster. I can feel the subtle curves around the doors and windows. This house will be so much a part of me, that I feel like my life is tied to it intimately.
I am so very thankful that we have come this far. It hasn't been easy. You know all of the times that you second guess yourself? Shortly after buying our property I wondered if it would be a good idea to sell our house then and live in a rental to save some money. Well, we didn't -- and selling our house when we did really cost us. It took a year to sell, and when it did it was at the bottom of the market.
It's really difficult to justify going into a project like this when you're $50,000 in debt from the last house. It's a scary business to embark on such a big thing as building a house. That being said we've discussed the idea of waiting to build until we have a better hold of our finances. It's a crushing blow to my dream, but one that I think is the right one. (Sigh.....) I've always believed that I could overcome just about any obstacle by my intense will and determination. It would kill me to start on this build, but not be able to finish. Or what would happen if I couldn't work and we lost the house?
See what I mean? Second guessing. Doubts. Worries.
Ok, so we put the dream aside for a few months. With any luck, we'll be able to put the foundation down by the fall. Then maybe start with the walls by spring.
In the meantime, Trinidad is wonderful. It rained today. Big, fat raindrops fell from the tumultuous clouds. Thunder and lightning lent some interest to the afternoon. I love real weather.
More later...
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